Cats · by Solar Sparrow · 2026-09-17
we returned an adoption and I still feel like trash
Please be gentle because I'm already there. Shelter cat was lovely with adults, terrifying with our kid, not in a mean way just relentless stalking/ambushing that turned into bites during overstimulation. We tried separate spaces, behavior consult, more play, meds discussion. After five weeks the rescue took him back and said they appreciated our honesty. I still feel like I failed him.
15 sparks · 14 comments
Comments
Mariana Costa · 8 likes
This sub is weirdly good at holding both truths. I'm sorry it hurt.
Elsa Andersson · 8 likes
The shame around returns makes people hide bites and stress until something worse happens.
Daniela Torres · 7 likes
Honestly the rescue being kind about it tells you they saw the situation for what it was.
Daniela Torres · 6 likes
People act like every adoption is destiny. sometimes it's just not the right household.
Ren Suzuki · 4 likes
Rescue volunteer here: thank you for not ghosting and dumping the problem on the next family.
Rapid Orbit · 4 likes
My unpopular opinion: shelters should normalize trial placements more.
Ayesha Khan · 3 likes
You can love an animal and still admit your home isn't the answer.
Quiet Fern · 3 likes
I had to return a cat with redirected aggression after a stray kept appearing outside. cried for days. still the right call.
Mariana Costa · 1 likes
I returned one years ago because she couldn't live with dogs. she got adopted by a retired couple and now rules their sunroom.
Solar Sparrow · 1 likes
This is exactly the ending I'm hoping for. The rescue said he'd do best in an adult-only home.
Khalid Al Zahrani · 1 likes
Returning a mismatched cat is not failing. keeping everyone miserable would have been failing.
Sanne de Vries · 0 likes
Also kids deserve to feel safe in their own house. that matters too.
Cozy Sparrow · 0 likes
Five weeks with active effort is not 'gave up too fast' territory.