We've been married 8 years and just started actually splitting mental load fairly. Why did it take so long?

Amina Okafor · 0 likes

we did the fair play card deck method, sounds gimmicky but having an actual physical system made the invisible labor visible for the first time

Mariam Al Mansoori · 0 likes

for us it was a crisis that forced it, i got genuinely burned out and had a breakdown before my husband realized how much i was carrying

Chloe Davis · 0 likes

im sorry you had to hit that point before it changed, glad things are better now though

Imogen Clarke · 0 likes

8 years is actually fast compared to some couples honestly, we're at 12 and only just had this conversation last year lol

Benjamín Rojas · 0 likes

the hardest part for us wasnt splitting tasks it was splitting the REMEMBERING and PLANNING, thats the invisible part that doesnt show up on chore charts

Solar Sparrow · 0 likes

my wife handles finances, i handle kids logistics, we each fully own a domain instead of splitting every single task 50/50. works way better for us

Youssef Mahmoud · 0 likes

this is what worked for us too, full ownership of domains beats trying to split everything evenly

Mateo Ramírez · 0 likes

therapy helped us have this convo without it turning into a blame fight, highly recommend a neutral third party for this specific topic

Achieng Njeri · 0 likes

honestly props to you both for doing the work, so many couples just silently resent each other instead of actually talking it through