Green Flag / Red Flag · by Pixel Mango · 2026-10-30

40 minutes late to our first date and he said "this is Spain, mujer"

I moved to Valencia from Rotterdam last year. Matched with a guy on Bumble, we agreed 21:00 at a bar in Ruzafa. He showed up 21:40 smiling, no message, and when I said I'd been waiting he laughed and said "this is Spain, mujer, 21:00 means 21:30." Then he was a great date. Paid, funny, walked me to the metro.

Is this a cultural thing I should let go or is it a red flag in any country?

20 sparks · 6 comments

Comments

Brave River · 10 likes

yellow. good date, bad start. tell him next time you'll wait 15 and then leave, see if he shows up on time

Oliver Smith · 10 likes

the "this is spain" excuse works for dinner times (people really do eat at 22:00) but not for this lol

LazyAstronaut · 0 likes

![happy kat dennings](https://media.giphy.com/media/iBEW5Amz0ztza/200w.gif)

Hana Choi · 5 likes

the dutch in you must have died a little

Isha Menon · 0 likes

Spanish here. 10-15 min late, ok, very normal. 40 minutes with no message is not culture, it's him

Brave Orbit · 9 likes

this. we're relaxed about time, we're not relaxed about leaving someone alone at a bar for 40 min